About a month ago, I found myself moved to action by a sudden realisation that much of what I do in life is motivated by fear. I was literally moved – I had been sitting in North Sydney Library at the time this thought came to me and I was instantly compelled to my feet, and to the back section of the library where there are shelves upon shelves of books that will tell you how life can be lived. I needed some nuggets of truth, some solid advice, to set me on the right path.
I’m not a stranger to these shelves but what I carried back to the loans desk was not what I would have expected: A Survival Guide For Life – How to achieve your goals, thrive in adversity and grow in character by Bear Grylls.
I didn’t know much about Grylls except that he was a TV personality who challenged himself to the -nth degree in wilderness expeditions. I knew he was a man who wasn’t ruled by fear and I decided to approach the book as a novice seeking advice from an expert.
I was hooked from the first chapter, where Grylls quotes T. E. Lawrence: “All men dream; but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act their dreams with open eyes, to make it possible.”
“All men dream; but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act their dreams with open eyes, to make it possible”
T. E. Lawrence
Bingo. Now this was more like it. This was the way I wanted to live my life. Not in fear and trembling and half-lived. What kept me racing through the book was Grylls’ compelling attitude. He loves life and knows how to get the most out of it. He certainly doesn’t let fear drive him. Throughout the whole book, his respect and encouragement for the reader is obvious. He’s not big-noting himself. He’s full of life and it’s infectious.
As for those nuggets of truth I was after, I learnt five key things about myself from reading his advice. Actually, it might be more accurate to say that I’ve re-learnt these things, thanks to Grylls. They’re things that I’ve always felt to be true, deep down but they’ve come to me again at a time where I was in sore need of reminding! I’ve listed them below because I’m sure they’ll resonate with you too. Thanks to Bear Grylls for his humble integrity in this refresher course.
1. I tend more towards being negative than positive
As Grylls points out, we can’t control our circumstances much of the time but we can always control our attitude. I have realised that my comments and response to everyday things is so often negative. I wouldn’t have called myself a negative person, so this came as a surprise. I’ve started practising positive thinking and I have to admit that it’s challenging. I don’t know why being negative is easier but I can certainly recommend positive thinking if you’re trying to build your character!
2. I love being positive!
Following on from 1. I am now aware that I really enjoy being positive, just as I enjoy being around other positive people. It gives a kick to my day and to my sense of wellbeing. It’s going to be worth the effort of retraining myself.
3. A satisfying life has much more to do with who I am than what I do
I’ve been caught up lately with what I do and trying to find purpose in that. To be honest, it’s felt like a journey full of I’m-just-not-good-enough thinking. Reading this book has reminded me that character is the heart of who I am. Ultimately, working on my character is the key to becoming more satisfied with my life. What I do in life will flow out of who I am, not the other way round. I have to start with the unseen. I’m not talking about a selfish introspective withdrawal or suggesting that what I do isn’t important. No, this is about getting my heart right, finding real joy in that and seeing what flows out of it.
I’m sure each adventure will look different through the various stages of my life but this has been a timely reminder that ‘settling down’ for me in my thirties is going to refer to a state of mind, a secure sense of self, rather than a location or a routine.
4. I want adventure in my life
I get so excited when I read about taking risks and doing new things! I’ve been reminded that I’m hard-wired for adventure and challenge. This isn’t going to change just because I get older. I’m sure each adventure will look different through the various stages of my life but this has been a timely reminder that ‘settling down’ for me in my thirties is going to refer to a state of mind, a secure sense of self, rather than a location or a routine.
5. The top two qualities I want people to remember me for are strength and love
It is obvious that Grylls leads his life abundantly and these two qualities, strength and love, jumped out of the book at me as prime instigators of his lifestyle. To me, being a strong and loving person is what it means to be who I was created to be. It got me thinking what my life would look like if I was infused by these characteristics and I loved what I saw! (Go on, try it and you’ll see what I mean). I sure have a lot of growing to do in this area but I know with the right people encouraging me, it’s going to make for a great journey.
No Comments